4. Weapons
First off, let me advise you that it is never advisable to go "zombie
hunting". That is an endeavor best left to trained professionals. In any
case where you have a choice between avoiding and attacking a zombie, you
should choose the former. Direct confrontation with a zombie is never a
wise decision. Should you however find yourself in a situation where
fighting a zombie is necessary, you need to be prepared.
A. Hand to Hand Combat
Hand to hand combat is a last case scenario. Of course it's safer to
shoot at a zombie from 50 yards than to tackle one. However, the
difference between life and death may be your ability to defend yourself
in a scrap. When selecting a weapon, remember, the only sure way to kill a
zombie is via a massive head wound. It needs to be light, durable, and
able to pierce through a skull, which is a difficult task. When choosing
your weapon, be sure to consider all these variables. Remember, almost
any weapon is better than your fists.
i. Chainsaw
Except the chainsaw. The chainsaw is useful in only a few
situations.
If
you're at your compound with a limitless fuel supply and are engaging a
limited number of zombies, the chainsaw can be a handy tool. Its loud
roar drones out the moan of zombies, and fills the
mind numbing silence with a constant reminder that you are holding a
deadly weapon. Don't expect the roar noise to even slow a zombie down or
cause it pause, as a zombie will not be able to distinguish the chain saw
from a vacuum cleaner.
There are a few downfalls to this weapon however. The first being the
noise it generates; enough to attract the attention of zombies miles away,
as well as making it impossible to hear cries from your friends or the
noise of a zombie sneaking up behind you. Second, if you're
inexperienced, they can be a little hard to operate and control. Aiming
one at the proper part of a zombie can be difficult in a fight. If you
hit an arm or stomach area, the zombie can push straight through the blade
and still bite you. Not to mention slicing through a zombie with a
spinning blade will spray you with blood, which will likely get in your
eyes, mouth, and ears, possibly leading to eventual infection. Just think
to yourself, "Would I hack up somene who had a bad case of Ebola with a
chainsaw?". As with any blade or ranged weapon, if the zombie gets too
close (sneaks up behind you, gets ahold of you), the weapon becomes
useless. Furthermore, they can be heavy, and if you run out of fuel in
the middle of a fight, you'd better have something else to fall back
on.
Pros: Makes you feel powerful, slices through flesh and bone quickly, lots
of weight behind the swing.
Cons: Covers you in zombie goo, attracts the attention of more zombies,
heavy, may run out of fuel, possible danger to user in a struggle, mutes
out surrounding sounds you may need to listen for.
Conclusion: If you're by yourself engaging a few zombies and don't have
any other weapons other than whats in your tool shed, it's a little more
useful than a rake or pitch fork, but not much.
ii. Stun Guns/Mace
The haven of the woman alone returning from a bar, warding off a
thief or
rapist. Sadly, like mace, the stun gun is a relatively useless weapon. A
direct hit to the head may stun a zombie for a short period of time,
allowing escape, and it's usage will not cause a spray of blood. However,
hitting a zombie in the head with a stun gun is difficult. Also, as with
the chainsaw, running out of power makes this weapon slightly less useful
than a brick. May possibly be successfully used on a zombie who is
attacking someone, if you can get behind and get a head shot with it, but
for the most part completely useless.
Pros: No blood = no disease, relatively quiet and compact, may stun a
zombie for a short period of time with a direct head shot.
Cons: No batteries = no use, body hits are useless, short range exposes
user to zombies grasp.
Conclusion: If you already have one in your purse or glove box, keep it in
mind, but if a zombie starts rushing you, don't go digging for it. This
weapon will probably be most often used on other panicing humans or humans
assaulting you. Remember, in a full on zombie outbreak, often your worst
enemy is going to be opportunists.
iii. Brass Knuckles
Adds a lot of impact to your punch. A direct punch to the eyes may
damage
them or shatter the face around them, obscuring a zombies vision. Also, a
zombie with no teeth isn't going to be biting you. A blind zombie is
still a danger though, and it's going to take a lot of punching to kill a
zombie. Plus, even without teeth, a zombie is capable of holding you down
while another zombie bites you.
A zombie isn't going to be aware of his
lack of teeth and will proceed to attempt biting
you and holding you as
normal. If your goal is a hand weapon of this nature, you may be better
off pistol whipping a zombie with your handgun than having yet another
weapon to worry about. I would disregard this unless it's all you
have.
Pros: Compact, light weight, easy to conceal, still better than
knuckles
Cons: Broken bones aren't going to slow a zombie down much, and you won't
be doing much brain damage with this weapon. Not to mention carrying one
with you is illegal in many places, so actually obtaining and keeping one
is going to be tricky.
Conclusions: More trouble than it's worth.
iv. Clubs
Now we're getting into something that may actually be useful in a
zombie
encounter. A baseball bat, a 2x4, any type of solid weapon that adds
range and leverage to the impact is going to be something to consider as a
possibility. Clubs can require relatively extensive beatings to be
effective. One classic example that comes to mind was the incedent a few
years back involving a young man who had taken a bunch of PCP painkiller
and after a thorough beating from four police officers during which he
sustained numerous hits to the head, he kept standing up. A zombie is
going to be completley numb to pain and broken bones, and enough head
bashing to crack a skull and subsequently destory the brain can take a bit
of work. Your average zombie is not going to be able to catch a club, and
will be pretty easy to crack in the face. Don't expect them to go down
after you hit them though. A good baseball hit to the head is enough to
send any zombie packing, but to actually kill one and stop its advance is
going to take a lot more work than you probably expect it will, so be
ready to hit it a good 25 or more times with the
weapon. Another issue
will be when they get close enough, a club is going to be rendered
ineffective.
Pros: Lots of impact, power behind a swing, typically light weight, easy
to find a makeshift one in a pinch. Relatively quiet, and gives you a
little range to do your business.
Cons: Possibility they may break, requires a LOT of beating to cause a
fatal head wound, hard to engage multiple zombies with a single club.
Lots of work may lead to physical exhaustion (try hitting a punching bag
with the same force required to crack a skull 100 times with a baseball
bat). Also good to ward off a single zombie, but makes multiple
engagements next to impossible.
Conclusion: If you've only got a single zombie to work with, it's a better
choice than a stun gun, will probably last longer and be safer to use than
a chainsaw, and gives you more range than brass knuckles. Still though,
not the best choice.
v. Knives
Killing a zombie with a knife is next to impossible. A typical knife
isn't going to be enough to puncture the skull and do significant damage
once inside. Beyond this, after stabbing a knife significantly deep into
human flesh, it can be really hard to pull back out. You'd have to come
in through the top of a zombies head or through his temple, jiggle
itaround, get him onto the ground, put your foot on his head, and yank
the
knife out. You'd probably be better off holding the knife by the blade
and hitting the zombie with the handle. Possibly less useful than brass
knuckles.
Pros: Easy to hide, allows quick hand movements, can lead to a one hit
kill if you hit the zombie just right.
Cons: Hard to score a temple hit, doesn't do much damage once in the
brain, and hard to pull back out. You're better off with a chair leg or a
frying pan.
Conclusion: Keep one around for utility purposes, but don't get it dull
stabbing zombies. If you are cornered and all you have is a knife, you
might be better off going hand to hand with the zombie. All cutting is
going to do is expose blood to you and probably end up costing you your
knife when you miss the stab and can't get it pulled back out.
vi. Swords
Right out. Slashing is pointless, stabbing through an eye socket
requires
too much precision (unless you can puncture an airborn tin can 100% of the
time with your sword, or stab through a grape at 3 feet range). Anything
short of a true samaurai sword is entirely useless. An extremely sharp
sword may be used to decapatate a zombie if you can get his arms out of
the way, but unless you've cut off a handful of heads or are a samaurai,
this is not something you're going to be successful at. If you miss and
hit the skull, your sword is going to be stuck, and if his arms get in the
way, now the zombie is shy an arm and 2 feet away from you, teeth and
right arm gnashing. A properly made (not a hedge cutting) machete may
serve a more useful purpose, as they have enough weight behind the
blade to hack pretty deep, but unless you can hack through bone in a
single swipe (try cutting through a 2x4 with a machete to test it out),
it's not going to be much use on a zombie.
Pros: They look pretty cool hanging on the wall. A perfectly placed slash
across the eyes or through eye socket is going to slow the zombie down,
but a sword stab through the brain isn't going to be enough to kill a
zombie unless it's a very lucky shot.
Cons: Everything listed above. A sword is designed to remove blood, and
you're not going to have any luck doing this with a zombie.
Conclusion: Hang it on the wall and forget it exists.
vii. Hatchet/axe
This is probably the first weapon I've listed that I would actually be
willing to use in combat with a zombie. An axe is not a good choice, as
they are large, cumbersome, and since they're only sharp for about 3
inches of the 4 foot long handle, a head shot is difficult. If you have
an axe, choke up on it and try to bury it into a skull. A full range
swing is going to probably bring the axe head down on the wrong spot, or
end up bouncing the handle off the head, leaving the head behind his
shoulder and difficult to retrieve, maybe even pulling him in closer. A
hatchet though is a very useful tool,
as well as a handy weapon. It's shorter range allows for more
control, and many of them possess weight
comperable to that of a full sized axe. Generally the heavier the head,
the better (within reason), and a range of more than a foot is not
necessary. Hatchets smash their way right into a head and are capable of
caving in a skull, as well as splitting through it once in. You're not
going for a cut here, you're going for a wedge that can be driven into the
skull. A hatchet probably one of your best hand to hand weapons.
Pros: Small, relatively lightweight, compact, can kill in a single blow,
useful as a tool, can be used multiple times, provides enough range to
stay out of a zombies grasp while allowing you to get close enough to
actually hit.
Cons: If you hit them in the shoulder, you may as well cut your own throat
because there is no way you're going to be pulling it back out except in
the case of an extreme wedge (we're talking the blade is around a 30
degree angle wedge). With an extreme enough wedge, the blade won't
actually pierce the skin, it will simply drive a lot of impact into a very
small area. In the case of a skull, this means splitting, in the case of
an arm, this means a broken shoulder. A broken shoulder won't stop a
zombie, but it will make the grabbing process a little more inhibited.
Conclusion: If you have to go hand to hand, consider this an option.
viii. Martial Arts Weapons
This section is painful for me to write, because as much as I've
always
been a fan of martial arts weapons, most of them are completely useless
against a zombie. Nunchaku: useless, Throwing Stars: useless, Tri-staffs:
useless, Katana/wakazashi/tanto/etc: useless, ball bearings: useless.
There are a few you may be able to put to use however.
A wooden tonfa (must be wooden or metal, police batons are essentially
glorified plastic) adds about 6 inches to a punch, can be swung around to
catch a zombie in the temple, and you can hold the back side and use it as
a makeshift hammer to pound your way into a zombies skull. It provides
a bit of defense on the side as it lies against your arms, and if you
catch
a zombie in the teeth with a tonfa backed up by a forearm, you're going to
be making it a lot harder for him to bite. Still not a lot more useful
than a club however.
A staff can be used as a thrusting weapon (in the fasion of a spear), a
club type weapon which you can snap from one side, then immediately from
the other, and if they get close you can hit them in the face with the
middle part to push them away. If they grab it, you're probably going to
lose it. Fortunately, they're easy enough to find in the form of pool
cue's, barstool legs, broom handles, and closet hanger poles.
Sai can be tremendously useful as they have a lot of weight and can
puncture a skull
pretty easily. They can be tricky to pull out, but even if you miss with
the main blade, the side blade can still inflict some damage. These also
provide a bit of defense as they can catch wayward limbs. A set of Sai
will allow you to kill a group of 2-3 zombies pretty quickly if you use
them properly. If you have to go with a martial arts weapon, you'll
probably want this one, but these are in a way much like an unsharpened
knife. If you sharpen the points properly however, these can be
almost as effective as a trench knife.
There are a number of chain weapons with blades and weights on the end
that you swing around. If you aren't already an expert with one of these,
you won't be able to use it properly. If used properly, the cutting end
won't do much damage. The weighted end can hit a zombie pretty hard in
the head, but if you miss, you may be losing your chain. Also if used
wrong and it wraps around the zombie you won't be able to pull it
back.
Pros: You can probably find a place to train you to use it properly.
Cons: Most of them are illegal to purchase or carry, depending on where
you are, and they suffer from the same flaws as knives and clubs. Weapons
of this nature rely on the ability to hurt and break the bones of your
opponent, or to dazzle them with flashy moves, none of which are going to
be effective on a zombie. If Bruce Lee and his famous nunchaku were
pitted against a zombie, it would be a tough battle, and chances are you
aren't Bruce Lee.
Conclusion: Grab something a little easier to use.
ix. Scythes
Theres been a bit of discussion about this particular weapon. If
sharpened and held right, it works like a sword on the end of a stick.
Gives the user a lot of leverage, and a lot of weight near the end of a
blade. You can cut a zombie in half if you use one of these properly.
Range allows the user some safety. You can treat it like an axe though;
if you get it stuck, you're out of luck. If you make the mistake of
stabbing with the end of a scythe, it's going to be hard to pull out
(though good for swinging the zombie about). Plus, it's far less useful
for utility. A properly made sword is probably a better weapon.
Regardless, a properly made longsword and a scythe are both clumsy,
impracticle, hard to run with, and if any crawling or navigating tight
areas is involved, you're going to have a hard time with it. Last thing
you want to do is run through a doorway and have the scythe clothesline
you.
Pros: Immense cutting power, capacity to slice a zombie into large chunks.
As deadly as a chainsaw (maybe more deadly), while silent and generally
not too hard to find.
Cons: If you miss, you're dead. If it breaks, you're dead. It has almost
zero usefulness in terms of utility, and it can be heavy and
cumbersome.
Conclusions: If you happen to be out in the feild harvesting wheat and you
spot a zombie, it may be more useful than a pitchfork. Gives you a wide
range of swing with deadly results. I woudln't go out of my way to get my
hands on one though. Theres a million better choices that are far less
exotic.
x. Hammer
Hammers may be treated simliarly to axes with a few exceptions. The
crowbar like claw on the end of a hammer is small and sharp, so can pierce
easily, and the hammering end is enough to push a nail through a wooden
board, so with a proper whack, can push a skull fragment into the brain.
The hammer can also be a very useful tool, serving to nail
things together or pry things apart. Generally they're highly available
and most people have one or
more of these at their house already. Think about it, I bet you
could find your hammer in about two minutes right now. Still, requires
you to get really close to a zombie, though unlike a sword or a
chainsaw, they remain useful in a grapling situation (choke up and whack
at the zombie
with the claw end while holding their head back with
a forearm in the neck).
Pros: Hard hitting, cheap, useful, immensely available in almost any household,
can be used either by the handle as a hitting weapon, or by the head as a
stabbing weapon.
Cons: Limited reach, limited usefulness at close range.
back of the head
Conclusion: If you were to look out the window right now and see a
zombie, and you haven't already started building an anti-zombie arsonal,
this is likely the most useful weapon you have in your garage/closet.
xi. Crowbar
If you don't already have one of these, go right now and get one. They're
generally cheap and immensely effective. Hitting with the back end of one
produces results similar to that of a club, the hooked end can be used in
the fasion of a hatchet to swing down into a zombies skull, and once in,
you now have something at the end of a lever to scramble some brains. The
Straight end can be used to rush a zombie and drive straight through an
eye socket and into the brain. They're relatively easy to pull back out,
lightweight, can hang from a belt, and most of all are useful tools. You
can use it to pry open or smash in a door or a window, and can even work
as a makeshift hammer in a pinch. If you score a skull hit that doesn't
kill a zombie, you can use your weight to throw him around by the end
you're holding. In the event of a head hit though, if the zombie stumbles
back or you lose your grip, you're out a crowbar. Maybe the best weapon
household weapon for a one on one encounter with a zombie. There are few
more effective weapons, and the few that are better are not as readily
available or as cheap as the crowbar. If you don't have any anti-zombie
weapons in your collection right now that rate a B+ or better, this is
probably your best first weapon.
Pros: All the best things about clubs, hatchets, hammers, and spears, with
a lot fewer of the bad. All metal assembly makes them immensely
durable.
Cons: Not a lot of weight behind the swing, so you'll have to swing pretty
hard. Also, after killing the first, if you use the claw end, sometimes
it can be tricky to get it back out. Be sure they're dead when you put
your hands right next to their face to pull the claw out. Remember, it
only takes one bite.
xii. Trench Knife
If you get the right one, this is one of the most deadly zombie
killing
weapons available. If you get the wrong one, it's going to be little more
useful than a standard knife, and will suffer the same draw backs. Any
flat blade knife is going to be hard to pull out, and hard to stab in. A
properly constructed trench knife is going to be almost as thick as it is
wide, and about 7 inches long. These were designed to puncture metal
helmets and kill soldiers in WW1, so will likely be tremendously useful in
puncturing a zombies skull. The brass knuckle style handle also adds a
lot of power to your punch. If you can find one (the antique ones may
have worn down in strength over the last 90 years, and they don't make
many of them any more), these are probably the only weapons more useful
than a crowbar other than the space mace.
Pros: Quick kill, quick retrieval, fingers protected for a punch, adds
weight to the hand, light weight, compact, easily concealed in a simple
sheath, thicker skinnier blade does more brain damage, and can enter
easier than a wider flatter blade.
Cons: Good luck finding one.
xiii. Space Mace
Easily the best weapon for hand to hand combat. Designed by Tom
Anderson,
this weapon is a zombie killing machine. The weight is more than enough
to get a hell of a swing out of it, the spikes can puncture a skull like a
hot sewing needle through butter, the axe end will split a skull as well
as being a useful tool. The ball part (in the event you manage to miss
with the spikes) is enough to crack a skull. The design by Tom Anderson,
which is becoming increasingly available is made of 440 stainless steel,
with an interchangeable blade and interchangeable spikes.
The tool for
removing and changing the blade and spikes is actually hidden in the
handle. This allows you to replace a dull blade or broken spike with
relative ease. It's sharp on every side. In a grapple, you can use your
hand on the ball part and use the blade to push back with, cutting a
throat, or simply holding the axe head and shoving a spike into a zombies
eyesocket. Combines the usefulness of a hand axe, a mace, a spear, and a
trench spike, plus in a pinch can be used as a hammer.
Pros: Dangerous on every side, heavy crushing power, useful at range or
close up, lots of utility purpose.
Cons: If you have to travel a long distance with it, you can't easily hang
it on your belt unless you take the spikes off and sheath the blade. If
you for some reason suddenly need to abandon your stronghold and know
you're going to be traveling a long distance, without a hand made sheath,
it's going to be a little bit of a hassle to travel with. Well worth it
if you can manage. If you have to flee and you're going to be
wandering/camping for a few days, you may find it easier to take a trench
knife or crowbar with you (crowbar being the easiest to carry in a method
where it's readily available, trench spike being the most deadly), but if
you're willing to deal with carrying it around, there is no better weapon
for an encounter with a single or even multiple zombies.
B. Projectiles.
If you're not an experienced hunter, don't even waste your time with
projectiles. Even if you are, I would put serious consideration into
finding something a little more reliable. Projectile weapons are useful
in a handful of scenarios: hunting game and fighting a war. If you have a
group of 20 people, 15 of them with hand to hand weapons and 5 of them
with projectile weapons, and a pack of zombies are nice enough to cluster
together, you may find some use with being able to drop 2-3 of them before
they get close. Chances are however that these 5 rangers would be better
off equipped with spears or something of that nature.
i. Slingshot
You aren't going to be able to hid a zombie in the head with a slingshot
and puncture his brain. The power to kill someone with a head shot isn't
there, the accuracy is probably not there, and if you don't score a kill
shot, now you have to drop the slingshot and grab for the knife.
Slingshots have no utility purposes, and you're not going to kill anything
bigger than a squirrel with one (if you can kill a squirrel at all with
one).
Pros: None
Cons: Too many to list. Don't even consider it.
Conclusion: Dennis the Menace has to date never killed Mr. Wilson with his
slingshot.
ii. Compound Bow
This may posess the power to kill a zombie with a head shot. If you can
hit a pumpkin being hurtled through the air at 20 yards 100% of the time
with a compound bow, this may be a useful weapon for you. Getting another
arrow ready can be time consuming, and carrying a quiver will interfere
with a backpack. The plus side is that they're dead silent, and if you
know what you're doing you may be able to kill 2-3 zombies before they can
even figure out where the arrows are coming from. Use it to deal with a
small group of zombies who don't know where you are, but remember, only a
shot through the brain counts, and a brain is about the size of two fists.
A neck shot or a shot through the mouth doesn't count, and a head shot
isn't a guarenteed kill. Chances are good a zombie will be running at you
with an arrow sticking out of its head, and as it eats you, you'll mutter
to yourself what a great shot that was. See the ammunition section for
types of arrows.
Pros: Silent, capable of piercing a skull with the right type of arrows,
murderously accurate in the right hands.
Cons: Hard to aim, a head shot doesn't guarentee a kill, quivers are
clumsy, limited ammunition (try carrying 60 rounds of arrows. much easier
to do with a gun clip than a quiver).
Conclusion: Handy to have in your fortress if guns and silencers aren't
available. A very quiet killer. Don't take one unless you have a short
range weapon to back you up and are traveling with a group of at least
four or five people who aren't relying on your arrow shooting
abilities.
iii. Long Bow
Very similar to a compound bow with a few differences: Nearly impossible
for a novice to aim properly, and provides less power at full swing. On
the upside they're a more simple construction, and if a string breaks at
an inopertune time, you can restring them fairly quickly. Plus, if you
get the right one, you can cut the string and use it as a makeshift staff
weapon, saving the trouble of carrying multiple weapons. See the
ammunition section for types of arrows.
|
Pros: Faster to restring and simpler mechanism than a compound bow.
|
Cons: You have to pull harder for less power, making it harder to
aim.
|
Conclusion: If you're experienced, they make a light weight and relatively
hassle free addition to your arsonal, but don't make it your primary
weapon.
iv. Cross Bow
Basically a rifle with a built in silencer, enormous ammunition,
less
power, and slower reload time. The crossbow delivers bolts at a very high
velocity, and they're pretty easy to aim. A staple of zombie and vampire
hunters in movies. The upside is that a headshot is going to do a huge
amount of damage. I've yet to see a crossbow that can successfully
deliver a flaming arrow (which is the main purpose in choosing an arrow
weapon).
Much heavier than a conventional bow,
but the possession of
sights (be it conventional or telecopic sights) offset this flaw. You
probably won't be carrying this PLUS a rifle. Only use if you're
traveling with a group, and only as an opening shot on an unsuspecting
zombie. A silenced rifle can be difficult to come by, but all crossbows
may be considered "silenced".
Pros: Massive power, sights make it easy to aim, silenced (compared to a
rifle).
Cons: Heavy, bolts are still bigger than bullets, lacks the firepower of a
rifle, slow reload time.
Conclusion: Use only to surprise a very small group of zombies, but have
the handgun and the crowbar at the ready for when they start rushing
you.
v. Throwing Stars/Throwing Knives/Tomahawks
Despite their depiction in movies, a throwing star has never been a
killing weapon. It's a weapon where you stop down the alleyway, wait for
your opponent to round a corner, let one fly, and continue running away.
Finding a well made one in the USA is very difficult (that cute little
star you got in china town with the picture of a dragon on it isn't going
to kill anything). If you have a set of about 30 professional throwing
stars you want to let fly into a group of zombies, even with 4-5 head
shots, you probably won't kill one.
Same goes for throwing knives.
They generally aren't heavy enough, and sticking one in the lung or neck
doesn't count against a zombie. Throwing knives to date have never to my
knowledge been used successfully in any sort of fight other than to scare
someone, or cause someone to bleed. You're not going to be able to stick
someone in the face with a throwing knife and kill them like they do in
the movies.
A tomahawk can be a dangerous weapon, as they're much
heavier
than any other throwing weapon, but sticking one in the head of a moving
target is going to take years of practice. Other than the ninja star, any
thrown weapon is going to take a fixed number of rotations, and the
finesse required to adjust that and take into consideration the movement
of a target getting closer or running across your field of vision is one
that you won't be able to just LEARN because you feel like using a thrown
weapon. If you're already an EXPERT, theres probably nothing I can say to
stop you anyway, just consider your ability to puncture through a skull
into a moving brain before you take other peoples lives into your
hands.
Pros: They're quiet, light weight, and can be used in the mean time for
utility purposes.
Cons: A dove is also quiet, and throwing a dove at the zombies is going to
be just about as dangerous as throwing a knife or ninja star at one.
Don't throw your tools away. If you get really good at throwing a
tomahawk, hitting a zombie in the back of the head can be a quick
kill without betraying your position, but it may be a while before you
can get your tomahawk back.
vi. Rocks/Ball Bearings
No, I'm just kidding. A rock? Who would use a rock to fight a zombie?
Ever seen a professional pitcher hit someone with a baseball? Chances are
good you aren't a professional pitcher, and even a professional pitcher
isn't going to be able to hit a running target in the head every time.
The ball bearing (the industrial, golfball sized one) was used as a weapon
in China by rebels some fifty years ago (if anyone knows this story,
please tell me; I don't remember the details). They were readily
available, easy
to conceal, and legal to possess and easy to get after all
their farm tools were taken away. They add a lot of weight to a punch,
plus double as a projectile. Unfortunately, a zombie isn't going to chew
you up any more slowly with a broken jaw and a missing tooth. If you
manage did manage to drop a really really big rock on a zombies head, you
can cause it a pretty severe head wound. Plus a hand sized rock doubles
as a quick bludgeoning weapon. But seriously, a rock? If that's the best
weapon you can come up with, you're probably better off using it to knock
yourself unconscious so you don't have to worry about being awake while
you're being eaten. If you're Andre the Giant or that guy from
Braveheart, and you can hurtle a boulder, you can mess a zombie up pretty
good with that. Assuming you can't accurately throw a 30 pound boulder 20
yards and hit something accurately, leave the rocks on the ground.
Pros: You can hold it in your hand, and they're everywhere.
Cons: A zombie is going to kill you shortly after you bank one off it's
head. Doing this won't even piss the zombie off like you probably hope it
will. It will simply get it's attention. At least you'll be able to get
a good laugh before you die.
Conclusion: Don't throw rocks.
vii. Sling
The first (and I think last) recorded case of it's successful use in a
fight was David vs Goliath. If you know how to use a sling, you can
deliver a rock or ball bearing with way more power than you can with a
slingshot or thrown with your bare hands. Also, takes a minute to prepare
and launch. These are a LOT harder to aim than you think, and hitting a
critter in the head hard enough to kill it in one shot is going to be
tricky.
Pros: You can make a sling out of a pair of pants or a bedsheet.
Cons: Now they're going to find you covered in bite marks and cold because
you have no bedsheets.
Conclusions: Use only if you have access to no other projectile weapon.
This is far less useful than a bow.
viii. Harpoon
This could be useful to build your peoples morale in certain
situations.
If you have the time and want to bolt one to the back of your War Wagon,
it can provide many fun hours of dragging zombies behind your truck. You
probably aren't going to be killing a zombie with a harpoon, it meerely
serves to get ahold of one from a distance. Don't consider this as a
weapon, just a
toy if you're bored. You'd be better off affixing a machine gun to your
vehicle and putting a gunner up on the tower than having Captain Ahab on
the roof spearfishing zombies.
Pros: after an extended war with zombies, it can be fun to drag one behind
your vehicle for a few miles.
Cons: It stops being fun when the zombie you're dragging gets wrapped
around a tree and rips the bumper off your truck.
ix. Blowguns/Poison
Poison doesn't work on zombies.
C. Guns
Your gun is going to be the staple of your arsonal, so selecting the
weapon thats right for you is going to be crucial. Don't start thinking
that a gun is a substitute for a hand to hand weapon, because there are a
number of things that can go wrong with a gun that are not present in a
handy steel weapon. Guns can jam, run out of ammo, you may drop your
clip, reloading can be difficult when your hands start shaking, etc.
Granted, in a struggle with a zombie, placing a gun to it's head and
squeezing the trigger requires the least amount of effort and provides
some of the worst damage as compared to any close combat weapon. Still,
the risk of accidentally shooting one of your group in a melee is a very
present risk. Please note: If you're in one of the many countries that
has banned all firearms, I would strongly advise against attempting to
purchase one.
The number and variety of guns are way too extensive to go into much
detail here, so I'm going to provide you with a few pointers to selecting
a proper weapon and briefly detail you in when it's appropriate to use the
different types of guns.
-How strong is the impact? A good way to ask this without saying "can I
blow a humans brains out with this bullet?" would be to ask if it's enough
to puncture a hog's skull and drop it during butchering time. Just
because a bullet can go through skin and collapse a lung doesn't mean it
will go into a brain and cause damage.
-What time of ammunition can you use with it? Check into the ammo section
below for suggestions on ammunition.
-What is the effective range?
-How hard is it to take apart and clean?
i. Handguns
Great close range weapons. Handguns are the staple of the American family
and in many places are not terribly difficult to find. Most of them
provide enough punch to kill a zombie (though a lot of the lower caliber
ones do lack the power to puncture a skull, so be sure to look into that
before selecting one).
ii. Rifles
To date one of the most dangerous weapons ever created. These come in an
enormous variety, provide incredible accuracy to a skilled shooter, and
can be rapidly reloated for multiple targets.
iii. Shotguns
Good weapons, handy, easy to get ahold of, and not nearly as useful as a
rifle. A shotgun is the staple of any zombie or demon hunter in the
movies. They lack the range and accuracy of a rifle, however. There are
some good uses for them which I will explore more
thoroughly in the ammo section.
iv. Machine Guns
Anything that sprays bullets in a wild fire runs a high risk of jamming,
consumes ammo like a starving hippo, and is going to be impossible to aim.
The purpose of these weapons is mostly to generate a lot of noise (sort of
like the chainsaw of guns). If you can lightly tap the trigger and limit
your bullet output to 3 bullets or less, these can potentially be aimed,
but you need to resist the urge to just squeeze down the trigger.
v. Assault Rifles
Same rough rules apply for all the other guns. Be sure you pick something
out that you can fire accurately. A hail of bullets is no substitute for
an accurately placed shot. If used properly, these are capable of killing
a TON of zombies.
Get good at counting your rounds so you don't have to
check your clip repeatedly and don't end up pulling the trigger in a
pinch situation with no bullets in the gun.
D. Ammo
After selecting the appropriate weapon, you need to consider the
ammunition you will be firing from it. This can be as crucial a decision
as the actual weapon you select, so be sure to consider your options.
i. Projectile Weaponry
a. arrows
An interesting thing about arrows as opposed to bullets: They weight a lot
more. Theres a lot of weight behind a foot of arrow shaft. With a
properly designed tip, a head wound will put this straight into the brain
of a zombie. You need deadly accuracy however, as penetrating a skull
with an arrow requires a sharp tip and a direct hit. A hit to the jaw or
neck will be mostly useless.
b. flaming arrows
Good compensation for a lack of accuracy. Necrotic flesh of the zombie
will dry out over time, providing an opportunity to set one aflame with an
arrow. Zombies generally will not know to pull the arrow out, resulting
in extended exposure to fire, and a possibility they will ignite other
nearby zombies. Be careful though, because fighting hand to hand with a
flaming zombie can be difficult, as you increase your chance of being
burned. Also, consider your terrain. Don't use if theres a risk of a
flaming zombie setting your compound on fire, or starting a forest fire
nearby. See our archery section for a guide to making and firing flaming
arrows.
ii. Handgun Ammo
a. FMJ (Full Metal Jacket)
A strong metal jacket encases this lead cored bullet. These are non
expanding and deep-penetrating bullets. Designed primarily for piercing
armor. Basically, they'll go through anything and out the back. Good for
making small holes in zombies.
b. JHP (Jacketed Hollow Point)
Has an exposed lead tip that expands as you work your way farther into the
bullet. Designed for maximum energy transfer into the target. Rather
than going in and out the other side in the same small hole, these will
either stop inside the target or make an exit wound much larger than its
enterance wound.
c. SJHP (Semi Jacketed HOllow Point)
Lots of exposed lead at the tip, causing it to expand more than a regular
jacketed hollow point. This will remove a LOT of brain matter with a head
wound.
d. FMC (Full Metal Case ,Truncated Cone)
A light copper jacket encases the lead core of this bullet, giving it more
penetration than a JHP, but more expansion than a FMJ. This is also an
excellent choice if your guns power is low, and you're finding difficulty
getting a JHP bullet to penetrate the skull.
e. SP (Soft Point)
Large amounts of exposed lead at the tip with a copper jacket, provides
deeper penetration than hollow points, but expands more than a full metal
case.
iii. Rifle Ammo
a. FMJ (FUll Metal Jacket)
Designed for target shooting and armor penetration. Small hole in, small
hole out. End result: Head shot may not prove fatal. Ignore this type of
ammo.
b. FMJBT (Full Metal Jacket Boat Tail)
Boat Tail reduces drag to provide greater range and higher velocity at the
point of impact. Still makes a small hole in and a small hole out. Use
it for sniping at zombies a long distance away. OK support type ammo for
a sniper.
c. HPBT (Hollow Point Boat Tail)
High range, high accuracy, hollow point increases energy dispersal. Great
long range support ammunition.
d. SP (Soft Point)
Exposed flat lead tip results in bullet expanding to up to twice its size
as it penetrates. This is an awesome bullet for opening up large wounds
in zombie heads.
iv. Shotgun Ammo
a. Buckshot
Provides great stopping power at short distances. The shot scatters
quickly, making a lot of small holes. Selection of shot size is
important, as various sizes will result in a different penetration power
and scatter (not to mention quantity of the shots). #00 is most common
among law enforcement. The pellets are larger and there are fewer of
them. #1 shot provides more stopping power, less penatration (meaning a
lower chance of shot passing through and out the other side, which may
damage whatever's behind what you're shooting at, either part of your
house or one of your team). Be careful using #00 shot, as you're putting
whatever or whoever is on the other side of the zombie at risk. It's a
toss up as to whether you want greater penetration or more controlled
penetration, so the decision should be based on what context you're
fighting in. Zombies require a controlled headshot and nothing take a
zombies head off quicker than #00 shot, but if there are going to be
several people with you and you want the ability to stop or slow a zombie
that is between you and a team mate, you'll want #1 shot or you may end up
killing the zombie and your partner. Anything smaller than #1 is going to
be relatively useless other than to momentarily slow a zombie down.
Effective range on buckshot is 25 yards and less.
b. Slug
Provides higher range than buckshot with greater power than a rifle. Shot
has a much higher caliber (.70). Not all types of slug will work in all
types of shotgun (smooth bored barrels require a rifled slug, just for
example). You should familiarize yourself with your gun and your ammo
before you start loading up and shooting.
E. Fire/Explosives
Fire has long been considered mans greatest asset; critical to warding
off predators and cooking meat. Take great care in employing fire as a
weapon however, because countless individuals have found that fire can
quickly turn on you and become an enemy instead of an ally. Fire can and
will destroy everything in its path, so be sure to use with caution.
Explosives, in this respect, may be regarded as a type of fire. Be
careful with them, as accidental detonation can cause injury or death.
All fire and explosives are strongly discouraged.
i. Flame Thrower
These are often flaunted in video games and popular fiction. They spray
unholy death on anything that comes in their path, mercilessly reducing a
crowd to a pile of cinders. Sound too good to be true? It is.
Illegal, decomissioned, hard to find, limited fuel supply (the fuel will
also be hard to find), and weighs as much as a television. If you're
standing in an open field, the last human left alive, facing a hoard of
thousands of zombies, this may be the only weapon that will save you. In
any other circumstances, however, you're going to have a hell of a time
putting this to good use (assuming you managed to get your hands on
one).
ii. Bazookas/Rocket Launchers
"Sweet Jesus, look at the zombie bits fly! Now quick, everyone back in
the... where the hell did our compound go?" Common sense should tell you
that this weapon stands too high a chance of destroying something or
someone that shouldn't be destroyed. Furthermore, your chance of actually
killing a zombie is going to be somewhat low. These are designed for
anti-building anti-vehicle use. Even when shot into a mob of zombies,
chances are good the rocket will fly right through the crowd and keep
going until it finds itself a target a few hundred yards down the line.
Unless zombies start driving tanks around, or unless you're planning on
trying to blow up a fuel canister or power plant packed with zombies,
don't waste your energy tracking one down
iii. Grenades
Seems like these would be tremendously useful. During times of warfare,
one of these is capable of flushing out a foxhole, or killing a handful of
unfortunates who are nearby. In reality these are far less useful.
Grenades are shrapnel weapons, which send bits of metal flying in every
direction, which penetrate flesh and shatter bone. A zombie will not fear
shattered bone or penetrated organs, and your chance of a headshot is
slim. You may find a use for your grenades, but killing zombies isn't one
of them.
iv. Moltov Cocktails
The icon of the oppressed commoner. Readily constructed from household
ingrediants, basically all you need is a bottle full of something
flamable, and a towel stuffed in the mouth (also flammable). Be sure to
plug the mouth completely with the rag so it doesn't fall out when thrown.
This will not burn unless the glass shatters, so be sure to throw hard and
don't use thick glass (a Snapple bottle will not shatter easily, a 40
ounce bottle of malted liquor will hold a ton of fluid and shatter
easily). Common household flammable ingrediants include gasoline,
isopropyl (rubbing) alcohol, bacardi 151 will burn like crazy (as will
most 100+ proof hard alcohols). Some types of nail polish
remover burn, theres lighter fluid, some types of hairspray... Use your
imagination.
It's not hard to find stuff that burns, just be careful. One point to
note: it's always good to wipe off the sides of teh bottle before you
ignite. If the fluid spills out while you light it, you may
have a serious problem (as well as third degree burns) on your hands.
F. Booby Traps
For defending the compound, it never hurts to set a few traps to stand
guard for you while you sleep. Numerous booby traps can be constructed.
Here we will only be discussing a few that you may find particularly
useful.
i. Foot Snare
A clamp trap or a foot snare is a good way to get ahold of a zombie and
keep it in place. The Freemont Bear Foot Snare has been used to catch and
release over 200 bears in the last 5 years. Obviously if it can hold a
large angry bear, it can hold a zombie. A clamp trap snaps shut like a
mouse trap and holds the zombie tight. Be careful with both of these
though, because a determined zombie will rip its own foot off struggling
to get free, and will not be detered by the pain these traps inflict.
ii. Net
If you can rig a net up to fall from a tree or pick a zombie up into a
tree when he crosses it, this is a sure way to hold it tightly and keep it
restrained. Can be reused multiple times (as with a foot snare). Lower
likelihood of a zombie struggling his way out or breaking off a foot to
get free. We will be including a section later detailing how to rig a net
trap.
iii. Tiger Pit
The easiest and most crudely effective trap. Dig a deep hole, cover it in
thin branches and leaves. When a zombie stumbles onto this spot, down he
goes. A zombie will fall in a clumsy fasion and will likely break
a leg or ankle even falling a short distance, plus, zombies are
going to be unable to climb and will likely break its fingers or
bury itself trying to claw its way out. Digging an adequate tiger pit
will be time consuming, and should not be tackled as a solo project. If
you're going to be holed up for a while, it never hurts to stick one of
these by your front door.
G. Reinforcements
For serious defense of your compound, you need to employ more adeqate
measures of protection than simply a tiger pit. Anyone with a shovel can
construct a tiger pit rather quickly. A number of booby traps can be
constructed with a little intuition. The following may be harder to make
or come across, but are crucial for serious defense of a compound.
i. Tripwires
A thin wire, barely visable, that when stumbled into causes something to
happen. This something can be anything you like, from pulling a heavy
object down on a zombie (you could try using it to pull a door open
holding heavy logs or boulders), to simply causing an approaching zombie
to fall flat on its face. The most simple and probably useful utilization
of this technique is to attach one end to a bell (if you don't have a
bell, rocks in a glass bottle or tin can will work in a pinch) to act as
an alarm system to notify you of an approaching stranger. They take
minimal time to set up and can be established with any kind of rope or
wire. Be sure to set up an alarm tripwire as soon as you establish a base
to make sure you don't get caught by surprise.
ii. Land Mines
Bury and forget, landmines have long been employed by the military to
slow and destroy approaching forces. A minefield is enough to stop an
army including tanks dead in its tracks with minimal exposure. There is
an added advantage to dealing with zombies in that they won't read warning
signs, and won't avoid big red flags marking the landmines locations. Be
sure to mark your landmines so you don't step on them in accidents. A red
spray painted X on the ground, or a flag will suffice, but be aware that
in a heavy rain, your markers may be lost, so have a chart that details
the quantity of land mines burried and their exact locations on a grid, or
you may find yourself stumbling into your own mines.
iii. Electric Fences
A simple electric wire used to herd in cattle or keep a horse from
chewing on a wooden fence is not going to even slow a zombie down. This
will be roughly as effective as a waist high wire in slowing down a zombie
(which, by the way, can be a lot more effective than you'd imagine simply
for slowing them down, as they're not good at ducking or climbing). A
high grade electic fence (think Jurrasic Park) will be enough to fry any
zombie that tries to force its way through and stays in contact with the
fence for too long. Don't rely on being able to get enough electricity
from your power plant though, as power will likely be going out, and using
a secondary generator is going to consume fuel as well as create noise to
draw zombies to you. These probably aren't worth the time it would take
to set them up.
iv. Moats
What better way to protect your castle than a moat? If you are short on
alligators, crocodiles, sharks, and thousands of gallons of water, simply
dig a world war 1 style trench around your residence. This should be
around 6-8 feet deep if possible, and about 4 feet wide. A zombie who
stumbles into a properly made ditch will be unable to crawl out. If
nothing else, this will keep it held for a while until you can come
execute it. If time and manpower permits, this can be an invaluable
asset. In areas with high rainfall, be aware that the moat may end up
caving in, causing a sloped bank next to the moat that the zombies can
simply walk out of. The walls have to be sheer. This is basically an
advanced version of the tiger pit.
v. Barbed Wire/Razor Wire
As a zombie can't climb, don't bother lining your fences with these. The
primary use for razor and barbed wire will be to tangle the zombie up.
Blood loss will not be an issue however, and unless there are a number of
hooks on the barbed wire (if you tie thousands of fishhooks to your barbed
wire, maybe it would work), a zombie will eventually struggle its way past
the barbed wire and on to your compound. Great to slow them down, but
don't expect it to stop them.
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